If our lives are like tapestries, then narratives feature prominently in their designs. Narratives are the stories that reveal themselves as truths, framing the way we view ourselves and others, shaping our decisions and conclusions and how we engage with the world.
We see ourselves as heroes, underdogs or warriors and others as friends, lovers, or enemies, along with myriad variations of stories and themes that emerge and reemerge throughout our lives.
Our narratives come from many sources. We infer them from our families, the media, and our own experiences as we extract principles and patterns that seem to hold true. Some have suggested that our narratives are rooted in our distant past through a collective unconscious or sacred contracts that proceed our births.
But regardless of their origins, our narratives become quite powerful once they are established, acting as lenses through which we interpret experiences and determine our actions.
Although many of our narratives are positive we are often most aware of those that are restrictive or negatively charged. Stories about being a failure, a victim, or a fool can take on such a heightened level of prominence that they become perpetually primed, tainting all experiences that they touch.
It’s not surprising that when we finally decide to reinvent ourselves, we often focus on creating entirely new narratives independent of those that have previously dragged us down. And while the work of starting anew can feel both invigorating and transformative, we quickly feel the familiar tug of our old narratives as they begin to undermine our growth and threaten to pull us back down.
For in our haste to distance ourselves from the past, we fail to sufficiently anchor our new narratives in our life tapestries, believing that they will weave themselves forward creating new designs that are both beautiful and strong. In doing so we underestimate the depth of our existing patterns and the myriad threads that both nourish and sustain them.
In moments of weakness or self-doubt our old patterns become reinvigorated and quickly infiltrate our new designs, blurring their boundaries and threatening their significance.
Ironically, our best opportunities for reinvention are those that allow us to reweave our existing details and experiences into new designs. By adding nuances, subtleties, and complexities atop existing patterns, we can create additional layers of richness that build on our past designs rather than competing with them.
Within the context of our careers this can mean cultivating new areas of expertise, audiences, or perspectives or perhaps a completely different approach to what we have done or seen.
Although growth is always profound in its effects, it often emerges from subtle variations and tones.
So as we contemplate our reinvention we should pause to appreciate the richness of our existing tapestries on which we can build.